You're suing and being sued. Your work skills and corporate acumen are being demeaned. And in the biggest insult, you are tagged with the Scarlet Letter. What do you do? (Cue Animal House track ...)
Road trip.
Or in this case, Road show.
Julie Roehm and Sean Womack, the former Wal-Mart marketing executives currently in a brouhaha with the giant retailer, showed up at a marketing conference in Hollywood this week to pitch their new consulting firm.
If you haven't heard about the case, you can read about it here. The quickie version: Roehm was an edgy marketing executive who was fired by the retailer after less than a year of service. She sued for breach of contract. Wal-Mart countersued this week, claiming she had an affair with Womack (then her subordinate) and misused her position to drum up a possible job at an ad agency. And it trotted out some eye-brow raising emails to make its case -- emails that Roehm's lawyers say are being misconstrued.
No doubt we'll be hearing about this case, with all sorts of salacious details ... or at least allegedly salacious details ... for a while. It seems obvious there was a clash of culture and approach. Roehm did do a Lingerie Bowl campaign for Chrysler. And Wal-Mart is the Church Lady of corporations. You kind of wonder how they ever got together.
Well, the fight should break up the earnings report monotony al least. But you have to give credit to the two executives (notice I didn't say couple) for going into the public eye with such racy stuff being said about them ... even if it was just to talk some marketing mumbo jumbo.
Mediapost, which staged the conference, interviewed the two. The first part is really tedious, unless you like marketing talk. But eventually they get to a polite brush off about the Wal-Mart (WMT) suit: you know, the usual talk to the lawyers bit.
"I'm just thankful, I think we both are, that people who knows us, who have worked with us in the past, know who we are, they know our character," said Roehm, with Womack nodding by her side. "You just have to stay positive, stay focused and do the things you know you could do well, and thankfully have a big enough support system that you're allowed to do it."
What will no doubt be great sport for the gossip crowd (not me mind you), is trying to divine the body language when they are asked about their relationship.
"We're very good friends," said Roehm. "We're certainly working together, but that's the context of our relationship."
It's just two people talking. You can watch it here. Great sport.

What if a Chinese company moved to buy Chrysler? The motivation is there, as Fortune's Alex Taylor notes (link below), but can you imagination the howls from Capitol Hill and the country at large? Communists in control of the maker of Jeeps and Dodge Rams? Lee Iacocca would never fit in a Mao suit! But money talks and if the Germans want to sell ... who's to stop them? Sure, you'd get some people arguing national security. Hard to make that case stick in pick-ups, though. You know, it'd be kind of interesting to watch the Chinese deal with hardcore U.S. labor unions and cut-throat car selling competition.
Fortune on Chrysler

A credit card for illegal immigrants. You've got to be kidding me. Providing goods and services to someone who is here illegally, who is ostensibly breaking the law, isn't that aiding and abetting a crime? Way to go, Bank of "America" -- a bank that also happens to outsource jobs to India, by the way. I used to think being an American citizen was special. Now I'm beginning to think the only thing "special" is that I get to pay taxes that other folks avoid. I know, I'm jumping on the Tucker soap box here ... but Jeez Louise this is getting ridiculous. Build the Wall. Now.
Credit card for illegals

Those who reveled in the warm winter and what it was doing for oil prices are getting a rude reminder about what winter is all about. But while oil prices are going up, they aren't going as high as you'd expect, even though Saudi Arabia and other OPEC members are muttering about keeping current production levels capped. Why not? I suspect there is not as much hot speculation money rolling into the market. Makes sense when you think about all the once-burned speculators in the fall. And with the weather as wacky as it is, by the time you establish a promising long position in oil, springtime could be here. Better to look at ethanol and hope for a strong driving season peppered with political "alternative energy" rhetoric.

So Fox is on the verge of launching its business channel. Gee, Tucker and I have some experience with that! Well, if it finally happens (it's been over two years they've been talking about it after all), it is an odd time. Lots of people are saying the market is near the end of a bull cycle. Generally it's the beginning of a bull cycle that gets people interested in business news. So the business base, investors seeking news and info about the market, isn't likely to grow. Mr. Murdoch apparently aims to take it out of CNBC's hide by being more business-friendly. I doubt if the network will take it lying down. It'll be interesting to watch who can out cheer lead the other. Am I web-worried about this? No.
Fox to run

If I was a top manager at Dell, I'd be ticked off. Michael Dell is canceling bonuses. Sure, you'll get a raise, but if you were doing any personal finance planning tied to that end of year bonus, this last minute move stinks. You can understand why Dell wants to do it though. His company is flagging and he needs to shake it up. He is also cutting down his direct reports in hopes of eliminating some company bureaucracy. Such moves always get applauded, after all, who likes bureaucracy. But you still need to be cognizant of why the bureaucracy developed in the first place ... sometimes after a clean out you find that a department did have a reason to exist after all.
Dell shake up

Mo' money, mo'money, mo'money ... they are doing that comedy number over at the oil companies these days. Both ExxonMobil and Shell put up big earnings numbers this morning. Exxon set the biggest profit in corporate history. All this even though oil prices are coming down. Ah, if we'd only bought the stock a year ago. Question is, will the gains be extended? In addition to price drops, the regulatory environment is likely to harden with a Democratic congress and Detroit's environmental push seems to be gathering steam. Still, those profits just seem to be rolling in.